2022 at 28 – How was it and what’s next?
Most likely a good number of you, in the last days of the year, if you have a chance to find a little respite between Christmas meals, you are looking back at what 2022 has meant for you. But I bet one of the first thoughts that come to your mind is: well, I didn’t do that, and I didn’t do that, and that’s why I didn’t get this. Is that right? No one is judging you here, the same way I proceed in a first instance, but starting last year when at this time of reflection, I was on crutches, I began to think more about what I did and less about what I didn’t. However, this question has been nagging me a bit: why are we never satisfied with what we have, we want more, and we are constantly dissatisfied with what we don’t have? This is where happiness in life comes into play, whatever you have, whoever you are, it’s all about your perception of what’s going on, and of course if you want a bigger meaning, your same state is tied to your purpose. I am not able to write and talk about the broad meaning, Viktor Frankl does it much better in his book Man’s search for meaning.
Instead, this year I tried to apply the Stoic paradigm, that our perception can distort reality to the advantage or disadvantage of our well-being. Well, the Stoics teach us to take things as they are, but I, at the age of 28, am now aware of the fact that I dress reality in a lot of emotions and I can’t really take things as they are, at least not at first. So, I decided to slightly change the current and from the role of the coach who pushes the athlete towards performance on every level, never being satisfied, I also started to play the role of the architect who makes a construction on the elements of reality, being grateful for every success. In other words, instead of setting abstract goals that I don’t reach, becoming dissatisfied that I didn’t reach them but at the same time progressing considerably, I better choose to set directions in which to go, enjoying every small victory also evolving. In the end, I don’t know yet where you evolve more, but one thing is clear, that the way you spend your time on Earth is much more pleasant in the role of the architect above.
Now after this semi-philosophical introduction, I can say that the year 2022 was one of the best and most productive years for me, and equally a year in which I did not had much results. And you have no idea how happy I am to be able to say this now on the anniversary of 10 years of theoretical independence, or as it is popularly called, after leaving home. Well, how to be happy if you didn’t get much results, you could ask me. Well, I somehow managed to enter that stage of life where I understood that there are more important things than results, but I also understood that results are facilitated by the direction we choose to go in a certain context that we can influence.
More simply, the result is the answer to the question: what do you want? A house, a car, a million euros, a nuclear power plant, etc. Well, in 2022 I was more concerned with the questions: why do I want this? and how I want to achieve this? Looking at the situation through the lens of these interrogations, I began to know myself better, even though I have been living with myself for 28 years. Good, and here comes the inflection point, where my course of action changes by following the reason and the process instead of the result. Also, from this position, failures are actually advantages, based on which you test your reason and improve the process. Afterwards, the results will come and go, but as long as you are firmly anchored in the reason and process, the results will become sustainable. As Simon Sinek says in his book The Infinite Game, the goal is to keep playing, not to win.
In conclusion, 10 years after my 18th birthday, I can say that I had a year in which I clarified my reasons for moving on this Earth, a year in which I settled on the directions I want to follow from now on and until I change my mind, a year in which I started building contexts and a year in which I recovered from ligament surgery, I traveled, met amazing new people, read 28 books, rided about 1,763 km on the bike, climbed mountains, started learning kitesurfing, practiced fitboxing, partied, enjoyed time with friends and family and finally had time to be happy with myself.
Now what’s next in 2023? Well, to continue what I started in 2022, of course, but now with a bit more focus on people. I would like to build bridges with as many people around me as possible based on our common reasons and not on the results to be achieved. That would actually be the definition of quality relationships, built with people different from you, based on your common reasons. The same is true for personal life or family life and who knows, maybe we will have here a new chapter in 2023.
That being said, if you’ve made it this far, thank you for your attention, and if any of the above helps, thank you again. Have the best possible New Year!
